A Prayer When Hope Is Gone

Dear God,

This one's for You.

You created all things. You gave me life, choices, freedom, thoughts, and emotions.

You gave me a life worth living and a life I have sometimes felt was worth abandoning.

Yet what is true will always remain: You.

You suffered for the freedom I hold. You gave Your life for me so that I may live.

If all things are possible, they are possible through You.

If there is love, mercy, and grace, they speak Your name.

My God. My Lord. My Jesus.

Even though my prayers seem unanswered, even though I cannot hear Your voice, even though You seem far away, a piece of You remains.

A small light that brightens a dark room. Not enough to explain the whole road, but enough for this moment.

Earlier I questioned You. I became angry. I wondered whether You could hear me or whether You had abandoned me.

And yet here I am again, talking to You.

Perhaps faith is not always hearing Your voice. Perhaps sometimes it is calling Your name into the silence.

I do not understand my suffering. I do not understand love. I do not understand tomorrow.

But with the same heart that cried and questioned You, I praise You.

I praise You, God. I praise You, Lord.

My God. My Lord. My Jesus.

Even here. Even tonight. Even through the tears.

Amen.